Scotland - Braveheart? Deep fried Mars bars? Ginger hair and pasty faces frowning from behind a veil of garish tartan? If that was your train of thought when you read the title, you should be ashamed of yourself. You need a re-education in Scottish culture. Mercifully, that's what you're holding right now.

Contrary to what the unflattering stereotypes lead one to expect, there is more beauty, romance and glamour to be found in this 78,722 square kilometer pocket of the world than there is room for here, so this is but a whistlestop tour of taste…

Edinburgh, the capital, the heart of Scotland, is where luxurious accommodation abounds. Entertainments exist to serve every taste however niche, shopping knows no end and the air is moist with the deliciously malty scent of breweries.

I strongly recommend a visit to Edinburgh in the rugby season, when you should follow the tribes of fans to Murrayfield. You will be sucked into the drama, beginning with the chilling performance of the lone piper atop the roof and a lusty rendition of "O Flower of Scotland". As your breath steams in a cool mist in front of your eyes, you will be enveloped in the atmosphere - warm with red-blooded desire for victory. Many a romance has been kindled in the presence of such national passion and, if you're lucky, you might well hook yourself a thickset, kilted hunk to take home.

For further inspiration, look no further than "Glen," the Scotch Beef stud of notorious adverts, who will make you swoon.

Speaking of which, meaty substance is something Scots do to perfection. For a fantastic Aberdeen Angus steak you'd be well advised to hit The Bothy in Perth. Even if you're after more international fare, you will be spoilt for choice in Perth. With Breizh, Santé and 63 Tay Street vying for your digestion, you'll want to linger over a few meals.

Now you are at a fork in the road, pun fully intended. Go north and just a short way inland you'll find my all-time favorite stop for gifts with a Scottish twist. Rather than taking home the same old airport tack, push the boat out and do your Christmas shopping in the House of Bruar's comfortable surroundings. Wrap yourself in stunning cashmere, discover tweed, or simply spend the day transfixed amongst the vast range of elegant ladies wear, before collapsing in the restaurant to enjoy high-end Scottish produce straight from the hills and rivers outside the window.

Alternatively, your next step is the Tay Valley. Drive east from Perth, or take the train route, through the agricultural hinterland of lowland Scotland, and allow yourself to appreciate the view of the distant snow-capped highlands in the winter, the richly colored heather in the summer, and the vividly turned leaves in the autumn. Eventually the valley will give way to a dense forest with the tips of turrets jutting into the sky above. You've reached Glamis.

History not your bag? That's fine. Go to Glamis Castle anyway for a meander through the gardens. You might see fit to process majestically through the Italian Gardens, following in the footsteps of Queen Elizabeth, the Queen Mother, who spent her childhood riding in her miniature pony-drawn carriage through the lush green grounds of the castle. Glamis really puts the "story" in "history" - its guides aim to intersperse wisdom with wit and fact with fairytale, a mix guaranteed to enthrall. Venture through each and every room, enjoying the general grandeur as you listen to the quirky tales of the guides in whichever language you prefer. It's alleged to be the most haunted castle in the UK. Make sure you scream if you see any ghosts…

Exhausted from the excitement, allow your stomach to lead you to Forfar. Just a 20 minute drive from Glamis, it's the historic home of one of Scotland's gastronomic treasures - The Forfar Bridie. James McLaren & Son is a family-run bakery in the center, which has been perfecting the art of the Forfar Bridie since 1893 and so is more than qualified to introduce you to its legendary pastry-wrapped parcel of aromatic minced-beef (yes, it's Aberdeen Angus beef again). Its hearty texture and steamy filling will warm you up even on the most frigid day.

While you're munching, begin the scenic drive up the A90 towards your next destination, Aberdeen. You may see cattle, sheep and grouse wandering freely through the rich contours of the landscape. Or yellow crops will flow across the fields in the breeze as you pass. I know it'll be difficult on this drive, but do pay attention to the road. Safety first.

You're now at your northernmost point of this visit - The Granite City. You've seen a lot of beauty, history and food already, and you've worked up an appetite for a party, no? Aberdeen is a university town and Club Snafu is the place to be for indie classics, live bands and comedy nights. Start early on a dram of whisky, which Scots export a billion bottles of per annum. Literally translated from Scottish Gaelic, uisge beatha means "water of life" - some accolade - and I'll wager that with a few sips of an 18-year-old Glenfiddich Single Malt, you'll begin to develop an affection for the drink. Don't worry if you're soon steamin' - your inebriated self will become immune to cold and sleep soundly. When you stumble out of bed the following morning, a bracing walk will restore you to your former self, and there's nothing more perfect than a round of golf for raising the spirits. Play on the same course as the champions at St Andrew's on the way back down the coast or wait until 2014 for the Trump International Golf Links' debut.

I guarantee that you will complete this itinerary consumed by an aching hunger for more of your new favorite country. Good news! You've only just begun! You have yet to embrace the Highlands, the west coast, or indeed the cosmopolitan corner we like to call "Glasgae."