Blind dating is more dangerous than most Chinese girls know

By Wang Han Source:Global Times Published: 2018/2/21 20:43:39

Illustration: Chen Xia/GT

For single Chinese women and men in big cities like Shanghai, blind dating has become a common and convenient way to find a partner and even a future spouse. However, a media report shows that blind dating in China can also be dangerous.

A wealthy, well-educated man in Shanghai was recently arrested after using a date-rape drug to incapacitate and sexually assault different females he had met on blind dates. According to Xinmin Evening News, the suspect, surnamed Wu, who claimed to have graduated from a top university and work as an independent movie director, also drives an expensive Mercedes Benz.

It was reported that Wu bought beverages for girls he'd met on blind dates, then slipped in date-rape pills when they weren't looking. His victims eventually became sleepy and lost the ability to resist his sexual advances. After waking up, the drug prevented them from remembering exactly what had happened during the encounter. On December 29, 2017, Wu was caught by police while raping his latest victim in the back of his car. The police also found some syringes, lubricants and condoms in his car.

In my opinion as a single young woman who has been on several blind dates, a man's high income and education background put many Chinese females at ease, and often even makes them lustful toward successful men like Wu.

In China, men and women are often judged more by their social status and material possessions than their personality or manners. Wu was considered "a catch" by most of the women he dated, so they were more than willing to drink alcohol with him and go back to his car with him.

As blind dating is now one of the most popular ways for single Chinese adults to meet members of the opposite sex, many are taking advantage of this trend to get the women they meet into bed by any means necessary, including lying about their social status and even using date-rape drugs during their encounter.

So how can young women better protect themselves from such creeps? One tip is to never reveal your personal information, such as your home or workplace address, to the men you meet. This includes setting some of your WeChat details and past posts to private so that strangers can not compile a dossier about you from which to later use for stalking or extortion.

Also, it is always safer to meet a blind date in a public place with many people, such as a busy coffee shop. Double dates are even better; invite a friend or colleague to accompany you. And certainly never - ever - go to a stranger's car or back to his or your home until you know him very well.

One of my girlfriends told me that a man she had already met twice invited her back to his apartment after their third date to watch a DVD. After finishing the film in his living room, the guy suggested they go back to his bedroom. The moment she entered his bedroom, he accosted her. Luckily, she was smart and fast enough to immediately leave.

But the most important rule, in my opinion, is to never jump into a relationship (or bed) no matter how successful or wealthy the person might seem or how highly recommended by the matchmaker.

In fact, every blind date I have ever been on has been arranged by my parents or grandparents. Usually the men have a good education, a decent job, a satisfactory income, a nice family background and, occasionally, a handsome appearance.

But more often than not, I tend to find that these men are just not very good or very nice people. Personality wise, most were incompatible with me. In some cases, these guys were just using our blind date as an opportunity to try to get a young girl into bed by flaunting their social status.

In short, it takes time to know a person, and it takes time to figure out whether the person is as serious as you about entering a committed relationship. So be smart, stay vigilant, and remember - only fools rush in.

The opinions expressed in this article are the author's own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Global Times.

Posted in: TWOCENTS

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