Texting and false intimacy

By Tiara Lin Source:Global Times Published: 2016/8/28 5:03:39

We all understand how important communication is in a relationship. But modern communication tools such as social media platforms can create a false sense of intimacy. Texting someone 10 times a day does not necessarily mean the relationship will last forever.

My friend Coco learned this lesson the hard way recently with a guy she met at the gym. He was tall and handsome, but not really her type. At first, she did not pay much attention to him until one day he approached her and asked for her WeChat.

Since then, he began to text her all day every day. Like many women, Coco loves texting. It facilitates two of the things she loves the most: mystery and romance. It also fulfills her need for attention and connection. Even though she was not interested in him at first, his constant messaging eventually caused her to change her view of him. "He must be really into me," she thought.

In such a fast-paced digital world, old-style talking on the phone is on its way out. Texting is seen as a new form of digital foreplay. The good thing about texting is that you don't have to respond right away. You can go to a meeting, go shopping, cook and eat, and then come back to the message. The conversation is still there. You always feel connected. "You will eventually fall for a person who texts you all the time," Coco said.

She fell for the guy. A week of texting, and she had already become addicted. She had her cell phone within arm's reach every day so that she would not miss any of his texts.

The problem of texting is, it is not sustainable. Again, we are all busy people. Texting back-and-forth takes a lot of time and energy. That same tall and handsome guy stopped texting her after they went out for a date. He suddenly went cold, and Coco could not understand why.

After reading an online blog titled Ask a Guy: Why Did He Suddenly Stop Texting Me? and watching the movie He's Just Not That Into You (2009) twice, Coco finally accepted that waiting for him to text her is like waiting for a ship to dock at the airport.

The sad fact is, texting seems to be the best for new romance, but it doesn't always translate into a greater relationship.

This article was published on the Global Times Metropolitan section Two Cents page, a space for reader submissions, including opinion, humor and satire. The ideas expressed are those of the author alone, and do not represent the position of the Global Times.

Posted in: Twocents-Opinion

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