About 800 students from a private school in Jiading district prostrated themselves and kowtowed before their parents as an expression of their filial piety Sunday at a grand ancestor worship ceremony.

The news sparked public discussion and debate about the practice of kowtowing.

The students were required to walk on their knees and express their gratitude to their parents who painstakingly brought them up. For their part, the parents were touched. Some were moved to tears by the act.

The school's administration and some of the parents thought the ceremony and the school's traditional Chinese culture education was a great success as it encouraged students to be more dutiful and considerate to their parents. But some education experts criticized the practice, calling the kowtow part of the dregs of traditional Chinese culture.

The kowtow and prostration were commonly practiced in ancient China to show respect and obedience to superiors, including deities, the emperor, teachers and fathers. Today, the practice is still common when people worship, but it is rarely done to one's parents.

Traditional Chinese culture encourages everyone to be dutiful and obedient to their parents. There is nothing wrong with children showing their love and respect to their parents, but the problem with the kowtow is that it goes beyond respect and enters the realm of unquestioning obedience.

The Chinese word for filial piety is xiaoshun, which contains two characters. Xiao means filial and shun means obedient. The word has caused many people to mistakenly equate being obedient with being filial. Thus, Chinese parents like to make decisions for their children, and they expect their children to comply without question. This also means that when children refuse to follow their parents' instructions, they are considered more than just disobedient. They are seen as defiant, ungrateful and unloving.

The problem with this way of thinking is that it ignores all of the other ways children can show their love and respect for their parents that have nothing to do with obedience. Helping with the housework and having heart-to-heart talks are two examples. 

Although parents have a much richer life experience than their children, it doesn't mean all of their opinions are correct. Many parents are less educated than their children, which narrows their worldview and shortens their foresight. They can make bad decision, just like everyone else.

Chinese children should consider their parents' ideas, but they must also learn to make decisions on their own. What most of today's Chinese children lack are critical thinking skills and the ability to make independent decisions. I suspect society's focus on obedience is at least partially responsible for these deficiencies.

Chinese children should learn to make decisions independently and learn to be responsible for their own choices. If they only listen to their parents and follow their instructions, they will be likely to blame their parents when they get bad results.

The act of kowtow itself is not a problem, but what the practice represents. It sends the wrong message that men are unequal. But all citizens should be equal, even parents and children. Children and parents should be able to talk to each other from equal ground.

Thus while the school is teaching traditional Chinese culture, it should first make a judgment on the content and make sure that students understand the whole picture of traditional Chinese culture. There is no need to re-establish every part of Chinese culture. Some of it is outdated, such as "ignorance is a woman's virtue." And rather than adopt the kowtow to demonstrate filial piety, the school should teach students how to show their love for their parents from their hearts.