Illustration: Xia Qing/GT

It's often said that "it's a man's world.'' But it's not that easy bearing the responsibility and living up to the expectations of this "man's world."

The training starts at a very early age. Much like everything else, the upbringing and social education of a boy and girl differs. Daughters are raised to be tender, polite, shy, loving creatures, but a boy must be tough, strong, and almost incapable of showing his emotions and feelings.

There are many clichés that a man hears from a very young age, "boys don't play with dolls", "be a man", "don't cry like a girl," and many more.

My brother and I learned to ride a bike together. When we fell and hurt ourselves, I was showered with kisses and hugs, while my brother was asked to be a "strong boy", bear the pain, and, most certainly, stop crying.

The process of turning a boy into a man continues, and the training goes on for almost his entire life.

Everything in their life is controlled by the same set standards, the color of their shirt, their favorite band, favorite movie, even the drinks they like.

A gentleman holds the door for a woman, opens car doors and pays the restaurant bills. When he goes to a movie, no matter how emotional the scene, he must hold his tears.

He must never let anyone know that he secretly likes Justin Bieber or that he likes romantic movies, and his favorite movie is Titanic - the manicure appointment stays a secret.

If a man even slightly strays from the guidelines, he is laughed at, made fun of, and called a girl or a sissy by his male friends and his loving girlfriend or wife.

There have been occasions when even I have teased my husband about getting emotional over a movie.

My girlfriend got upset with her husband because he cried during one of their fights and she couldn't understand why. It's almost incomprehensible for us to see a man cry or show his emotions.

It's the man who is expected to go down on one knee and propose to the woman; he must have a decent income, a house, and a car if he wishes to get married. He must be the breadwinner of his family.

In today's world, when women are fighting for an equal status in society, they are still expecting "Women first" to live on.

Why shouldn't a good job and decent bank balance be the criteria for a woman to get married as well?

If the definition of the ideal woman has to change, then we have to stop stereotyping men as well.

They should be allowed to wear pink or red and order fruity cocktails without getting a frown or smirk from onlookers.

Men are losing touch with their feminine side and afraid to show their true selves because it may not be in keeping with the acceptable image of a man.

The outcome is either a person conflicted with himself and forced to live a life of double standards, or a pushy, insensitive, chauvinist who is also rejected by the world. Where can the man go?

This article was published on the Global Times Metropolitan section Two Cents page, a space for reader submissions, including opinion, humor and satire. The ideas expressed are those of the author alone, and do not represent the position of the Global Times.